My sister is Young Women’s president in her ward. It is very poor and inactive. She said the reason she was called is because she owns a house and is not as transient as other ward members. She is short on teachers and a counselor. When a new person moves into the ward, she has to compete with the Relief Society pres to get a calling filled and RS almost always wins. She is getting burned out.
Many say the all callings are filled by inspiration, but in her case it seems more desperation-callings remain unfilled due to lack of activity. And if both the RS and YW presidents have inspiration for the same person, is it really Inspiration or Desperation?
Wheat & Tares 
Sometimes it is definitely desperation. For example, if you are the only person able to play piano in your ward, you can guess what calling you will get. I don’t believe that there are just one “right” person to fulfill a certain calling. Sometimes there are several. And maybe there are sometimes none who is ideal, and then it is all about desperation.
Sometimes the person is equally able to fill either calling, thus both auxiliaries may feel inspired to request that person, & then it falls to the bishop to make the call. I have had one calling that I know was a “desperation” call, because the bishop told me it was – everyone else had said no. It was as a den leader in Cub Scouts, shortly after our son turned 8. I was reluctant to accept the call, because my impression of the scouting program was anything but positive, but our son loved Cub Scouts, so I said yes. I. have seldom had the volume of direct inspiration that came with that calling & because of that experience, I can testify that the Lord will honor callings extended thru desperation as well as thru inspiration. I held that calling for multiple years, & for at least one of those years, I held a mixed weekly meeting with a Wolf Den, a Bear Den & the Webelos. I know in the manual it says the same leader cannot be den leaders to the Webelos & another level, but the Pack Chairman & I found a committee position that, in the absence of the Webelos leader, was supposed to fill that role. She promptly asked for me to be called to that position, & that was our work-around. I also play the organ, & so have had more than a few experiences with callings of desperation in that regard as well, but none as dramatic as my experiences in Cub Scouting.
When I moved into a ward about 13 years ago I was formally called by the Primary and the EQ to serve, I can’t recall now how I got with the Primary or what the EQ thought but I got extended a call from two different auxillaries, I always thought that was weird!
Some people who love their calling can’t understand why “The Lord” wants them released, but a few months later they love their new calling. I’ve had the same calling for ten years ; not really sure if it’s insp. or desp.
Well, I’m a Calvinist, so there’s no difference. Providence gonna providence.
I would really urge your sister to set some boundaries as to what she can realistically do, as difficult as that is. It’s important that she takes care of herself-she can be of no use to anyone once she is burnt out. Both my husband and I held several callings concurrently in our then small ward and stake, as a consequence we have damaged our health and our ability to care for our children in the long term-in the short term we damaged our family and their capacity to develop testimonies of the gospel. We were rarely ever at home together, of course that was no way to live as a happy family with time and energy to enjoy each other’s company. I hope you will be able to help your sister gain a sense of perspective and support her in her self care. I think selflessness is no better than selfishness, it brings it own set of problems and doesn’t help others towards self reliance. Largely, we wasted our time.It’s essential that we enjoy our lives and are fed ourselves, even the Saviour took time out.
When I served in a bishopric it was 98% desperation and practical need and 2% inspiration. I know people like to think it is the Lord but in most cases we had to make practical decisions. Sounds like this sister has the same experience in many ways.
My dad (somewhat of a TBM) said callings were by, “Inspiration, relation, desperation, and occasional condemnation.” He said that with a chuckle.
And I am with Mike on the %. I have been in a few bishoprics and I only have one time that I think I kind of felt like I was inspired to give a certain person a calling. But then again – I don’t think that I have hardly ever received a confirmation from a prayer.
My understanding of calling by inspiration was that the Bishop prayed for guidance, then made the best choice he could.Sometimes the decision is harder than other times – if there are lots of good candidates or no good candidates, for instance, it’s harder than if there’s an obvious good choice, and may require more inspiration. But I never thought that God took the choice away from the Bishop. Desperation doesn’t necessarily preclude inspiration.