A temple worker told me an interesting story. Apparently there is a veil waiting room where workers wait for the endowment to conclude. Male and female temple workers are segregated, with an attached doorway. As the endowment session concludes, female temple workers enter the men’s veil waiting room in order to enter the endowment room for the presentation at the veil, and men would often stand when the women entered the men’s veil waiting room. However, this ritual of men standing when women entered the room made the women feel uncomfortable. They told the temple president, and the temple president told the men to remain seated when women enter the room. One man said that the new practice felt strange because he had always been taught to stand when a woman enters the room as a sign of respect.
According to Modern Gentlemen,
Does the modern gentleman still stand for a lady when she enters the room? It is a custom that is seldom followed these days, but some gentlemen do still do it. I can see why it is not widely adopted….
Do you always stand when a woman enters the room as a sign of respect?
Wheat & Tares 
There’s a few other mormon practices I find strange: standing for GA’s, and standing at funerals. I’ve been at a meeting, and wondered why the entire audience stands in unison, only to discover a GA had entered the room. I guess it is respectful, but seems a little like idol worshipping to me.
When attending a Mormon funeral, it is customary to stand when the family of the deceased enters the chapel. I don’t mind doing it when it is for another family (although standing for all the cousins, aunts, and uncles seems to make this funeral processing too long), but I must say I felt uncomfortable when people stood for me at my brother and sister’s funerals. Yes, I understand it is a sign of respect, but I’d rather say, “it’s just me coming into the room–you don’t need to stand.” Maybe that’s what the women are feeling?
I don’t understand why the women veil workers objected — if the women were assuming their stations because a session was coming to an end, then wouldn’t the men also need to take their stations? This case seems very much like the example in the Modern Gentleman piece — rising in this case may be a show of respect, but it also accomplishes a practical purpose, which should remove the awkwardness from all sides.
Mormon Heretic, the congregation stands when the casket is being carried in or out, as a mark of respect to the deceased. We remain standing as the family files in or out, because wouldn’t it be awkward to sit once the casket passed your row? I respect the dead guy, but not his widow? Believe me, nobody was standing to honor YOU, no matter what a great guy you are — they were standing in respect to the deceased, and extending that courtesy to the people who mattered the most to the deceased.
As a woman, I appreciate gentlemen standing in social situations (joining men already seated for dinner), but not in professional ones. That is, if I arrive in a room with several men and women seated around a board table, it’s convenient for the group leader (man or woman) to whom I’m being formally introduced to stand so that we’re comfortable shaking hands. But unless I’m going around the table to shake hands with everyone (not a common occurrence), I really don’t want all the men at the distant end of the table to stand, especially if that leaves women at the table remaining seated. You have to distinguish between social and professional settings.
Aep, when my brother died, we had a memorial service in California at his old ward, about a week before his actual Utah funeral. His body and casket were in Utah. When my mom, my wife, and I arrived in the California chapel, everyone stood for us. There was no casket, so yes, they did stand for me, not my brother who wasn’t there. I appreciate and understand the sense of respect for my family in our time of grief, but i felt awkward that they were standing for me.
Once the casket has passed, I wouldn’t mind if everyone sat down. To be honest, some families arrival in the chapel can take the entire center section of the chapel, and it takes the entire clan quite a while to be seated. I think it’s awkward, but your feelings may differ.
A ward council I used to attend stood for the women as they entered. Often the sister missionaries who regularly attended the ward would enter a few minutes late causing the whole meeting to stop for a few minutes as they took their seat. The older members of the council took the custom in stride, but I think it embarrassed the women and especially the tardy missionaries.
I don’t think I’ve seen the custom practiced anywhere else. Like AEP said, there are social and professional situations where it seems appropriate, but I don’t think that those situations discriminate on gender. And while standing for GAs is an acknowledgement of actual authority, standing for women seems more like a way to hold women in place, pedestal-sexism style. It implies that the woman’s gender defined role is so important, that we stand for them as they enter the room, so they can then sit down and participate in the council as long as they don’t talk too much.
As an ordinance worker in the Jordan River Temple, I read this several times, trying to understand what was happening in this post. This may be done somewhere, but not in my experience. There is indeed a waiting area for those who will be helping at the veil and by and large the men and women congregate separately, but there is also plenty of crossover and no reason they must or do keep separate, as it is a single space. There is an audible signal that the session is about ready for us and we line up. Whether men or women are first mostly depends on which veil we are going to and its access from the waiting room. Temple Presidents seem to have a lot of leeway in deciding how to run things in their temple.
This is a tradition that is unfamiliar to me. Yes, I would think it’s a bit disconcerting.
I don’t like it. It seems designed to keep women at arms length, as other, on the outside, not part of the group.
This practice was force fed to the Elders at the MTC while I was there (in 2006). It was extremely annoying. We had class together all day long with frequent breaks. Anytime any women would walk back into the room from a break, the Elders were required to stand. If they didn’t, someone would always call them out on it. I think the idea was to communicate respect for the Sisters, but to me it just felt like a giant waste of everyone’s time. Not to mention having to stand up and sit back down from those little uncomfortable desks 87 times a day probably wasn’t any good for the Elders. Also, I think for some of the Elders it just made them resent our being there all the more. They were jealous of the districts with no Sisters where they didn’t have to be bothered by this. It sure didn’t help the Sisters integrate and feel like part of the group.
Instead of making an elaborate show of reverence for women, how about actually respecting them? You know, as people?
Our culture still has a problem with enabling abuse and violence against women. Fixing that deserves more attention than enforcing outdated social customs.
#6 – when I grew up in Central Florida, which is PARTLY “Southern” (the rest is an interesting mix of transplants from the Great Lakes and “New Yawk”), it was an expectation of an older woman or someone in authority, like a teacher. Almost to the same extent that an ‘authority’ male would command. Among peers, however, it would have been considered ridiculous.
But that was some 40 years ago. Even the old homestead (which was built new for us at the time) isn’t visible from an Google aerial, with the trees that I helped my Dad plant ca. 1972-1973 having well grown and practically obscuring most features. So has the Orlando area changed, from what I’ve been told by a buddy who served his mission there and I knew him as one of my school chums is LDS, there was one stake going from Lakeland to Daytona Beach, where now six exist. It’s called change…hopefully but not always, for the better.
I sounds like a faith promoting (or otherwise) rumour designed for some purpose.
We had one here that 70% of drivers stopped for a breath test were drug or alcohol affected. The police issued a statement that the figure was below 5%.
Douglas sounds like a fire hazard, or do you not get bush fires? Cool and beautiful though.
I’ve vacillated on the standing thing over the years. While I think standing for women only is a bit silly, I feel like standing when someone like the Prophet or an Apostle walks in the room may no be reducible to simply “hero worship.” Everyone in a courtroom stands when a judge enters and I believe everyone stands when the POTUS walks in a room. At work, when we hold a particularly formal meeting, everyone already at the table stands when the primary attendee gets there. I’m sure there are other examples like that.
In the Corps, we stood whenever a (commissioned) officer entered the room, with the first to see him/her announcing the fact to the rest by barking, “Attention on deck!” This is an ancient sign of respect to military authority, and the gender of the officer makes no difference.
Unless the officer is a complete arsfardel, however, the custom is for him/her to immediately respond with “As you were,” meaning there’s no need to get to one’s feet. One merely makes the gesture of beginning to rise, thus demonstrating the respect, and the officer acknowledges it and pays respect in return by not making you drop everything and stand at attention. Unless, as I said, s/he is a jerk.
I’ve never seen nor heard of a GA telling everyone to remain seated. Perhaps the standing thing makes them uncomfortable, but they simply gave up trying to break the habit of the crowds. I can imagine, in particular, a former Marine like Elder Perry being tempted to bellow “As you were!” out over a crowded stake conference upon entrance. 🙂
Standing is a sign of respect. I find it deeply moving when I’ve stood up for someone else and very moving when someone else has stood up for me. One of the most beautiful acts I’ve witnessed was when my grandmother died (I was 8 years old). During the funeral procession of cars from the chapel to the cemetery, the police directed traffic to stop and I’ll never forget –a man and his young son who had been held up by our procession, got out of their car, stood and bowed their heads in reverence as the motorcade passed them. Their act of kindness that day moved me incredibly. And that’s why when I am driving and am stopped due to a funeral procession, I get out of my car, stand and bow my head to let them know I stand with them, to let them know that I understand and respect their mourning.
And I happen to be female. When you don’t know what to say, or can’t say anything, a gesture speaks volumes beit a hug or simply standing up.
P.S. I do think men at church should stand up when women walk into the room. It’s supposed to remind them to be respectful of women–to really mean it. Many LDS men do not respect women the way they should–they need to be made aware of that.