“While there is no promise of immediate safety in the final scenes of the earth’s existence, there is a promise of eventual victory.”
—Thomas A. Wayment, The New Testament: A Translation for Latter-day Saints (First Edition quoted hereafter)

Recently I reread Revelation, the final book of the Bible. As an agnostic trying to maintain a meaningful connection to my religious heritage, I do this sometimes—picking out a particular book within the canon, something frequently quoted and utilized avidly by churches. Other books I’ve done this with in the past few years include Jeremiah, the Gospel of Mark, the Gospel of Matthew, The Acts of the Apostles, and Paul’s epistle to the Romans.

HOT TAKE
Gospel of Mark = CNN; Gospel of Matthew = Fox News.

You’ve just read the first in a series of hot takes, which is how this post will proceed: an excerpt/comment followed by a hot take. These are prompted by the literalistic reading habit I developed when I was younger and active in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Now onto Revelation, an apocalyptic text which may or may not (very likely not) have been written by one of Jesus’s original apostles.

“I turned to see the voice that was speaking to me, I saw seven gold lampstands, and in the middle of the lamps, one like a son of man, and he was wearing a robe that extended to his feet, and he wore a gold sash around his chest. And his head and hair were white like wool, as white as snow, and his eyes were like a fiery flame. And his feet were like polished metal refined in a furnace, and his voice was like the sound of many waters. He held seven stars in his right hand, and from his mouth came a sharp two-edged sword, and his face was like the sun shining in its strength.”
—Revelation 1:12-16

Personally, I find the above imagery mesmerizing, even cool! I grew up better acquainted with Joseph Smith’s depictions of heavenly beings in The Pearl of Great Price and Doctrine and Covenants.

HOT TAKE:
Joseph Smith’s divine imagery is to Revelation what George Lucas’s Star Wars is to popular literature he consumed growing up. More derivative than innovative.

“And I saw a mighty angel declaring in a loud voice, ‘Who is worthy to unroll the scroll and break its seals?’ And no one in heaven, on the earth, or under the earth was able to unroll the scroll or to see inside it.”
—Revelation 5:2-3

HOT TAKE:
John the Revelator might as well have been talking about a sword stuck in a stone.[i]

“And when he opened the fifth seal, I saw under the altar the souls of those who were murdered because of the word of God and because of the testimony they had given. And they cried out in a loud voice, saying, ‘How long, Lord, holy and true, will you not judge and avenge our blood upon those who live on the earth?’ And to each of them was given a white robe, and they were told to rest for a little longer until their fellow servants and their brothers and sisters reached the full number of those who were going to be killed as they had been.”
—Revelation 6:9-11

HOT TAKE:
So… the image of the famed early Christian martyrs seems here to be one of bitter sons and daughters of God in the Spirit World. They call out not for peace and justice, to say nothing of forgiveness. Rather, they cry for vengeance, and it seems they may hope to receive it. The official response from the Lord is: Give me a minute; I need to rack up some more killings first.[ii] (Dr. Wayment? Can we please skip ahead to that “eventual victory”?)

“And they sing the song of Moses, the servant of God, and the song of the Lamb, saying,
Great and amazing are your works,
O Lord God Almighty!
Just and true are your ways,
O King of the nations!
Who does not fear you, O Lord,
and give glory to your name?
For you alone are holy?
All nations will come
and worship in your presence…”
—Revelation 15:3-4

HOT TAKE:
You can put on progressive Mormon sackcloth and ashes and tell me white Christian nationalists are wrong. I’ll stand by your side. But folks? It’s not like they’re pulling their rhetoric out of thin air. The Bible drips with nationalism.

What is to be done when everyone in the fight clings to the same book?

“…Behold, the dwelling place of God is with humanity, and he will live among them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them. And he will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death will no longer exist, nor mourning, crying, or pain, for the former things have ceased.”
—Revelation 21:3-4

HOT TAKE:
And there it is! The warm and loving God who embraces us and welcomes us home. It wasn’t easy, but it was worth it! I’m sorry I ever doubted you, Lord. Wait…

Where have I seen this before? Oh, yeah. Isn’t this how abusive relationships work?

Thoughts and Discussion Suggestions

The above post neither purports nor attempts to be a scholarly analysis of scripture. As Wheat & Tares’ usually-creative writer, I wished to showcase a gut-level reader’s reaction. Now I invite you to chime in. I’m especially interested in people’s feelings about whether or not Revelation can be useful outside of literal readings.

Honestly, so long as I’m reading it as fable/allegory, I think Revelation is pretty cool and thought-provoking. It’s certainly visually entertaining. For me, the problems arise when yet another generation of Christians[iii] wave the book at me and claim it is literally about us and our day.[iv]

[i] Monty Python has assured us such tales are no basis for a system of government (although… they were talking about a matriarchy run by strange underwater women distributing swords to minors… so maybe we shouldn’t take them literally either)

[ii] For another great moment in God and his angels being violent to non-members, and rather creative about it, read Revelation 9:4-6.

[iii] Going on two millennia’s worth now

[iv] For a scholarly and level-headed take on Revelation, I recommend viewing a recent TikTok post and a second one by Dr. Dan McClellan. If you’d like to give the subject more time, I recommend John Hamer’s lecture on YouTube: “What the Bible Doesn’t Say: Revelation”