Paula suggested in comments on my year in review post last week that we write about callings in the Church, what we liked, what we didn’t like, and what surprised us about a calling.
I have written a lot about my calling as Bishop. What I liked was all the fun stuff I got to do with the youth. So many good memories of father/daughter camps (I had three daughters, so no father/son stuff), temple trips with the kids, then going to get ice cream sandwiches at Diddy Riese in Westwood by UCLA. I sprained my ankle on a rope swing with the scouts once. The rope broke, I ended up in a pile of rocks and was on crutches for months. That earned a lot of street cred with the kids. What I did not like was the endless meetings. My daughter was in a Refeile Society Pres in Texas, and once had to go to a correlation meeting when the RS Pres could not. She called me afterwards and asked how I could stand all those boring meetings. She said it was a complete waste of time!
My creed as a bishop was to just do, then ask forgiveness after from the Stake Pres when I did something. I figured what’s the worst that could happen, they fire me? Lots of discussions with the SP, and chastisements. Who knew that I wasn’t supposed to let a sister in the ward become an internet minister so she could perform a wedding for some friends? That wasn’t in the handbook!
What surprised me the most in that calling was what we see on Sunday in people is not the whole story. The family that looks like the perfect Mormon example; a complete mess at home. The person that smells of tobacco and does not attend very often; the most Christ like person in the ward!
My other callings
- Branch Pres in my mission
- YM Pres
- EQ counselor
- EQ Pres (twice)
- Bishopric counselor (twice)
- Membership clerk (twice)
- Financial Clerk (three times)
- Stake SS Pres
- Stake fincial auditor
- Sunday School teacher (Gospel Doctrine twice, youth classes more times than I can remember)
(Of note: I was never called to the High Council, tender mercies! )
I did not like being EQ Pres. So much busy-work! All the pressure on Home Teaching! I did like teaching the youth. We had a blast in class, and I still get compliments from the now grown kids 20 years later! Financial Clerk is the one calling that you can do 100%, get all the paperwork done, and not feel guilty during the week. Every other calling leaving that nagging feeling that you could be doing more!
I realize that almost all my callings were male callings, and that women need not apply. But I just saw on the stake web site that our stake has called a female Stake Auditor for Finances. Who knew women could count???? I wonder what else they might do?
So, what have been your favorite callings? Did you ever have a calling that you really enjoyed, and looked forward to fulfilling it? What were some of the big surprises in callings? Which ones did you hate? Did you ever asked to be released or “quit” a calling?
Wheat & Tares 
I was primary pianist for a total of seven years in two different wards. Best calling in the church.
My view is much the same as it was when I wrote this: https://wheatandtares.org/2014/07/31/serving-in-the-church-callings-a-personal-perspective/
I also was primary pianist in every ward I’ve been in, with the exception of student wards. Over and over and over. At first I felt the same way Jack does–show up and do your job, no one bothers you, children are adorable, don’t have to listen to sexist lessons in RS, etc. So in that sense, I did enjoy that calling. But after awhile, I always started to feel like I was neither contributing nor getting anything out of my attendance. Sure, it’s a contribution in the sense that somebody has to do it, but it doesn’t require any personal contribution or thought. The last time I was asked to take that calling I declined, knowing my feelings would quickly end up in that place. I guess I’ve become more selfish and selective.
One thing I hated about that calling, and all callings, were inservice meetings and stake meetings. Ugh. So much wasted time, and so much pressure to attend to support leaders.
The calling/assignment I have always liked least is visiting teacher/ministering sister. I really don’t like the idea of assigned friendship. Our church experience is already full of so much role playing, but forcing (faking) friendship takes the cake. I really would so much rather my acts of friendship were from the heart, and how can you understand your own motivations if the relationship has been assigned? One acquaintance commented that she and her elderly companion would visit the young mother, where she and the new mom would discuss breast feeding, and then they would visit the older sister where her companion and that sister could talk about hemorrhoids.
• Best / hardest – bishop. We did some amazing summer activities and I took the YW to another state on a YM style activity and got in trouble. Objected to the POX and stake president told me choosing me as bishop was his biggest mistake.
• Worst – EQ pres
• Most surprising- stake and ward organist. I’m a BYU trained organist and often played energetic, alternate harmonies which caused controversy. People in my area want boring, soft hymns.
• Easiest – primary pianist
• Most boring – High Council
• Most contrived – teacher development teacher
Hedgehog, thanks for the link to your prior post. I relate fully.
The most meaningful calling I have held in the church is visiting teacher/minister. I love this calling. I love getting to know people I wouldn’t ever meet otherwise and I love service in connection with this calling. I have always preferred assignments to inactive women.
The “highest ” calling I have held was stake primary secretary. I held that both before, during and after the pandemic, for quite a while. Sooo boring. It was such a struggle to find meaning and purpose in that calling, even for the president or counselors that were invited sometimes to meetings with the high council. I was always specifically excluded as secretary while all the male secretaries were invited to these big meetings. It seemed like such a petty exclusion.
We had to go to all these ward conferences and listen to the SP give the same talk over and over. Then we would attend primary with our assigned high councilman and our President would say a few words to the children. Afterwards we would meet with the Primary presidencies, who usually didn’t have much to say to us.
After all, they weren’t under our authority (which we didn’t have any way). They were under the bishop’s authority. We were at most cheer leaders and friends that were mostly ignored. It was hard to find much meaning in that.
The president did tell me by the time she left office she had been a support to a couple primary presidents that struggled with their bishops, and she had been able to let the SP know about their bishop’s inappropriate choices herself.
I am currently Activity Boys leader. I am a long time scouter still involved in traditional scouting outside the ward. I was Cub Scout Committee chair in the ward for a while. I did 11 year old camp, and cub scout day camp. I was also briefly a 1st counselor in a primary presidency. These callings showed me the underside of leadership in the ward. It wasn’t pretty.
I was choir director for years. I can sing soprano, alto and tenor. I love to sing but usually there is no pianist and I end up accompanying. I can sing while playing the piano if the song is familiar.
I have served as primary pianist and as organist for many years.
I have taught primary endlessly, all ages. I am a perennial substitute. I have taught RS and Gospel Doctrine and Gospel Essentials. I have served as ward missionary. I have been the visiting teaching coordinator, twice. I have been in almost any RS calling that isn’t a presidency.
I have never served in Young Women’s.
I have never been a president of any presidency, and only a counselor or secretary twice. That feels weird, like I have been specifically excluded from that purposely because I have lived in a tiny ward that rotated the same people over and over through those callings and didn’t include me.
I have been told my direct way of communicating is intimidating and unattractive to some priesthood leaders. In family counseling with a psychologist who was also a former SP, I was told this is because I am a mother of special needs children. Mothers of special needs children have to learn stand up to authority or their kids needs don’t get met. I certainly have learned to stand up to doctors and nurses. My counselor said priesthood leaders are generally uncomfortable with women that stand up to authority.
Plus they always have the excuse of my special needs children to think or say I am too busy and burdened and have a ready made excuse to exclude me from anything in the ward.
My highest profile calling was High Council. But I can honestly say it was almost all show and no substance:
1. I was assigned to my own ward and I was great friends with the bishop. So very little chance for me to have any impact “from the stake”.
2. My talks were assigned topics and even though I tried to plug in some personality and substance they were mostly rehashed talking points (not because I didn’t know how to give a good talk but rather because we were pretty controlled).
3. Actual stake business like Church courts were tightly Controlled as well and we were always going to go in the direction of the SP ultimately.
What l learned in that calling was that my service as an EQ was 10x difficult, impactful, and substantive and that being in the HC was all image.
I was the YW president for only a year. During my time, I pushed for a lot of change. The YW got to be ushers in Sacrament meeting. The YW got to pick their class names instead of having “12-13 year olds” as their name. I pushed for having the girls pass the sacrament to the women in the mother’s lounge (that one didn’t fly with bishop). I pushed for the RS president to sit on the stand every week (bishop said he asked- she didn’t want to). I wore pants to church and a rainbow pin. I refused to teach the chastity and marriage lessons. I tried so freaking hard to create change. And you know what? I realized that even as a YW president, I have absolutely zero power. I can’t call my own leaders. I can’t plan a temple trip without a male leaders because apparently the temple doesn’t provide priesthood to baptize the YW- we gotta BOYP (bring our own priesthood). I can’t even plan a trip for the YW seniors without a man to accompany us! Heaven forbid the YW organization is just for YOUNG WOMEN. Every week I battled with the YM and missionaries who kicked my YW out of being ushers. “The YW are ushers now,” I would say. Blank stares.
I went to stake meetings, ward council, YW meetings, all the meetings and I just got so fed up with the mansplaining, belittling, and condescending behavior from the male leadership in the room. There was a very real moment when I realized that the men in my ward just don’t get it. I was worn out from trying. My husband got called as an assistant to the executive secretary (apparently that’s a thing?) and I guess that means he’s in the bishopric now. The Sunday he was called, he got a key to the building. (Literally) I was president for a year and was never given a key. It was a lightbulb moment for me. It wasn’t about the damn key- I just realized that this church is a boy’s club and I would never be allowed in. I ended up asking to be released a couple weeks later. The bishop didn’t call me in to talk about it or even tell me he was releasing me- it was just announced over the pulpit. A couple weeks later, the new YW president got rid of all my changes. No more ushers. No more class names. Everything back to normal like I never existed.
Favorite: Primary music leader- I related to the kids well and we sang sang sang. I tried to sing as much as possible and get the kids singing a variety instead of the same 5 songs all the time. This calling was exhausting and powerful and moving and funny all at once.
Least favorite: Cub Scout den leader- I did this calling for years and really struggled with it. I didn’t connect with the kiddos and hated following the manual. I have no aptitude in this area and I think this (non-Sunday callings) is where this particular ward put people who are active but don’t have a temple recommend.
Biggest surprise: Gospel Doctrine- I had always said it was the one calling I never wanted and I was shocked when they called me to it, but I dove in and did lots of research and I had never spent much time in gospel doctrine (on account of being in primary all the time) so I brought up stuff like Oliver Cowdrey’s diving rod and other subjects that can be challenging. I got excellent feedback in that calling and it really stretched me.
Katie I’m so sorry.
I initially enjoyed primary pianist but it gets old after the third stint. I asked to be released and no one would replace me so the music director just used her phone. My calling was outsourced to technology!
Turned down high council and have zero regrets.
Hated bishop second counselor. I knew I would. Boring meetings, leaving my wife with four kids including a newborn to fend for herself, and our bishopric just never jelled. I had hoped to at least make some friends in a high demand calling but for lots of reasons it just never happened. Bishop said he didn’t want friends and the other counselor said he had enough friends.
YM was a mixed bag. I enjoyed the kids but deeply hated the lessons and lack of budget or program. Again I asked to be released and told the bishop it just felt like a poor man’s sports club and it was a waste of time.
Loved activity day boys! No one cares about this calling or age group so I got to do whatever I wanted and the boys at that age are good sports to try things.
Rather than deciding callings between priesthood callings and women’s callings, things really should be divided between introvert callings and extrovert callings. A bishop needs to be an extrovert. A Relief Society president needs to be an extrovert. First example. My husband and I were in a ward with an introvert as bishop. Disaster. My husband was 1st counselor in the bishopric, and so he saw the disaster first hand. Ward members who had, oh, say committed adultery, waited until bishop was out of town, then had to confess now, no they didn’t want to wait for bishop to get back in town. They were quite happy to confess to Brother S. One sister, trying to decide to divorce, no, she didn’t want to wait for bishop to come back and was quite happy to talk to Brother S. The first couple of times things like this happened, Brother S just thought bishop was out of town a lot and that was why this just kept happening. It took a while before we realized people waited for bishop to leave town so they could talk with Brother S. Our bishop was at best awkward and bumbling. This was really too much pressure on my poor husband because he felt that he didn’t really have the keys to deal with everything being dumped on him. But he had the personality needed. 2nd example. Me as Relief Society President. Another disaster. I just didn’t have the skills to lead. It didn’t help that I had an incompetent bishop….and I guess if the bishop had been competent, he would have seen the problems with that calling before issuing it. I saw the problems in the ward better than he did, but did not have the skills or personality to pull a troubled ward together. I knew the calling was all wrong when it was first issued, but felt railroaded in to it, and being the sweet introvert I was, didn’t have the guts to say “hell no” to a bishop.
Yes, I have turned down callings. Best way ever to get blacklisted.
Agony and Ecstasy: Being bishop is an endless roller coaster. Working with the youth was rewarding – they provided quick, honest feedback. Had an older gentleman serve as HP Group Leader. He would write monthly letters assessing my performance. His criticisms included poor quality home teaching (I thought that was his job) and not enough emphasis on serving the elderly. Staffing the ward was also frustrating. The toughest positions to fill were RSP and YWP – had several sisters angrily turn me down. The prevalence of porn related issues among a relatively well to do suburban ward was both surprising and difficult.
Boring: The HC is a vast wasteland. These positions are populated by either bishop wannabees or old men being put out to pasture. No meaningful responsibilities and endless meetings.
Sublime: Ward Music Chairman is the perfect job. The opportunity to encourage musicians to perform a variety of spiritual numbers is rewarding. I particularly enjoyed the ward choir’s rendition of Amazing Grace during an Easter program. Expanding the repertoire of typical boring Mormon music was a highlight.
Over the years I’ve had many callings in four different states, Elder quorum counselor and instructor, Bishopric 5 times in three different wards/stakes/states, State Sunday School President, Young Men Counselor/instructor, asst. Ward Clerk (I did it because it was all computer and the Ward Clerk at 85 couldn’t but he told great stories and I loved him a lot and didn’t mind), Early Morning Seminary Teacher in 3 different wards, was even an adjunct Institute Instructor at a large university that had a small LDS population and one Institute Instructor and I hired to provide a different approach (he was progressive and it was much appreciated), a Youth Sunday School Instructor, Gospel Essentials Instructor, and Gospel Doctrine Instructor in 3 different wards which was my favorite calling. After my last time in the Bishopric, I didn’t really have a “substantial” calling at any level for a couple of years even though I still helped the ward clerk. Eventually, I knew I was regulated to the wastepile of members when I was called to be the 2nd Counselor in the Sunday School Presidency in a ward that only had 100 people attending weekly and only had 3 Sunday School Classes and I was never asked to even substitute any of the classes. Finally, the last straw came when the Stake President called my wife and me into his office to what I thought was going to be a calling for my wife but ended up being a calling for me that he wouldn’t tell me what it was because he wanted me to be a full tithe player. At the time, we were deeply in debt because my wife was bipolar and her personal therapy was buying stuff online without ever telling me. I didn’t really find this out until we were divorced a couple of years later but when I asked her to tell him, she just remained silent. Anyway, he looked at me and said I’d lived in that ward for 25 years and had contributed nothing to the ward (I’d been in three bishoprics, ward clerk, YM, teaching, seminary, and even the Stake SS President). He gave me a week to think about it and when he called back and I said no, he coldly said “Have a nice life (in a snarky voice).” That was about 15 years ago. It took a bit longer to say “I’m done” but not getting any callings except for the 2nd counselor in the Sunday School Presidency, getting divorced, and sitting alone on the side bench without anyone on the bench in front or behind me helped me see that I didn’t really matter. Trying to stay involved for a few years both in and out of the church was also frustrating. I eventually got remarried but my wife had her own LDS trauma to deal with (worthy of another post and helps me understand the frustrations of the women who have already posted). We sent her son on a mission and he’s still very active after coming home be we quit going together. The sad thing, in the four years since we haven’t been, the only person who has reached out is a teacher friend whom I worked with for over 30 years and she talks to my wife who now teaches where I taught.
My favorite calling was Gospel Doctrine because it always amazed me what people would say during discussions of the lesson. One of the more memorable was when someone was explaining what the New Jerusalem was going to be at the second coming. He said it was going to be a ready-built city that would be from the Appalachian Mountains to the Rocky Mountains from the Dakotas to the Gulf of Mexico and would be a 40-story contiguous building. The class looked at me and I bit my lip and said I was going to stay in our little Utah town and not go there. It broke the tension, and they all laughed, the guy who said it felt he had contributed and I wasn’t dissing him and I realized there are a lot of people out there who either have no clue, make things up, or will believe anything, are active members of the church and people believe them.
Here is what I remember from my callings that I have had. I can’t fully remember the callings in my BYU wards. If I had them, I really don’t remember doing much for them.
Temple prep instructor
EQ instructor for some 4 years in two different wards
EQ service coordinator
Second Counselor in Ward Sunday School Presidency
Librarian
I enjoyed being EQ instructor. EQ service coordinator didn’t amount to much since there was already a ward service coordinator. 2nd Counselor in SS was a completely nonsense calling. Librarian was a very social calling and allowed me to get to know people in the ward very well. I spent a good portion of that calling just shooting the breeze with people in the ward often during SS and EQ.
I think that’s it. I no longer accept callings and haven’t for 2 years. The main reason is that I just don’t feel comfortable. For when I am doing the calling, people see me as a full-on believer and a person who is willing to serve in other capacities. To avoid a series of awkward interactions and conversations I simply decline callings and have let the bishop know that I simply do not believe in the core teachings of the church. I think it is fine to serve and enjoy being engaged in service. I simply don’t want to be in positions where I feel pressured to stand up for the church’s teachings.
Favorite: RS newsletter. Once a month, emailed out, easy and fun. Until we got a new RS presidency. One Sunday, a counselor called me and told me they wanted a weekly newsletter printed and handed out. I said I couldn’t do that but would consider it. 2 hours later I walked into RS and that counselor tried to hand me a stack of newsletters she had created to pass out. I told her that if they didn’t trust me to do my calling they could do it themselves. I was released the next week without anyone saying anything to me and that counselor did the newsletter every week.
Same ward, I was chatting with the YW president and mentioned I’d love a calling in YW some day. She looked me up and down and told me I’d never have a calling in YW because I wasn’t a good example of a Latter Day Saint woman. As one of 2 full time working women in the ward, I understood what she meant.
Least favorite: primary teacher. I was a new convert without kids and didn’t know what I was doing.
Those are the only 2 callings I’ve had in almost 20 years.
Current ward I haven’t had a calling the decade we’ve been here. When we first moved in I was asked to be on RS activities committee but it met the same night as my son’s community Cub Scout pack, which I told the bishop. My husband said he didn’t want a primary calling and they called him to primary and he declined. The ward decided it’s easier to ignore us.
At this point in my life, it would almost be easier to list the callings I haven’t had than to list the ones I have. E.g. I haven’t been the first counselor in any presidency, though I’ve been the second counselor and the president of all three open to women.
Most fun: Primary chorister. The most fun job in the church because you can pretty much do whatever you want, and all of the problems belong to someone else. I was having so much fun, the kids also thought it was fun. (This was back when church was 3 hours, so I had enough time to really play with music.)
Most isolating: The 3 years I was both the only ward organist and the primary pianist. I came early to play sacrament meeting prelude, rushed through a short postlude to get to primary in time for that prelude, stayed sitting behind the piano until after all church meetings were done. I didn’t talk to a single person at church during the entire time. By the time I asked to be released from Primary, I didn’t know anyone in the ward.
Most eternal: Ward organist. I’ve been doing this for 20 years, often in concert with another calling. I will never have another calling. It’s not that I’m irreplaceable. It’s just that there literally isn’t anyone to replace me. I love playing, but I totally understand why so many people refuse to learn.
Most rewarding: Gospel Doctrine teacher. Done it 3 times and loved it. I wouldn’t accept the calling now because I don’t think I could teach it in a way that would be acceptable to the ward members in general. I’m not interested in having/leading the same discussions for the hundredth time.
Most hated: Nursery leader. I have no idea why anyone would call me to this position, but it has happened twice. For me, this one is pure torture.
Most boring: Ward librarian.
When I was active, about 90% of the time I taught either Gospel Doctrine or Relief Society. I loved those callings. Right up until I’d have a meltdown. The pressure to believe everything and be a good example was more stress than I would acknowledge, and I pushed myself right to the edge in those callings.
I spent a little bit of time in the library. Once I was briefly and uselessly the Family History Coordinator.
I went from GD and RS teacher straight to the nursery in three different wards. Bad experience. The nursery is the first calling I ever asked to be released from.
My last calling before I quit attending was teaching my son’s Primary class. I enjoyed it. In fact, I asked for that calling. My testimony was on really thin ice at that point, and I was dodging the uncomfortable conversation that would take place if they tried to call me to teach GD or RS again.
I have never served in a presidency of any organization. Not even once, not even as secretary. I was a YW advisor for less than a year, but that’s as close as I got. I was fine with that because I’d rather be a teacher, but after 20+ years, it did puzzle me that I’d never been in a presidency. (Oh wait, once I talked to a bishop who was checking to see if I could accept a calling as RS counselor. I was a single mom to three very young children and no, I couldn’t go to meetings unless they called me a babysitter. So that was my only offer to be in a presidency and the bishop didn’t extend the calling after we talked about my circumstances.)
Most favorite was early morning seminary teacher. Least favorite was bishop (I came so close to resigning from that calling when the POX came out).
I was RS teacher for about 18 months, and Activities Day coordinator at the same time while in a faith transition. I was the best RS teacher they had had in a long time (the other “bests” got called into stake-level callings) – and that is 1 reason I stayed until 2021 as an RS teacher. I was the coordinator because my divergent developing child needed a higher level of support and a different level of support than anyone could provide.
Before then, I “called myself” into being a nursery leader because we had a small nursery and I had one of the few children in that age group. To be honest, most of the time, I just had inspiring church-friendly music on and watched the kids, and made sure to administer the snack. It was all I could do at that time, and no one else was there to say otherwise. 2x they changed Primary presidencies in that time – and I dealt with them dealing with their sheepish assumption that I was the nursery leader, and then trying to call me officially to be a Primary teacher (I said “No” because reasons). It baffled the sisters in the presidency because a) I took the trainings and was “certified” in the system to be a primary teacher, and b) there wasn’t a good reason for me to be in Primary from a safety/kid stance. A few Sundays after I “un-called myself”, one of the older sisters was working resentfully in the nursery and gave me judging looks (she assumed that “I was slacking my calling”.). I never figured out how to tell her that the year I spent in nursery was me hiding while in a faith transition and trying to serve honestly (and support my preschooler).
I am an introvert and perhaps a little on the autism spectrum. I can do physical things, but not good at others.
My first calling was as the son of a building supervisor, in the days when church buildings were built using volunteer labour. My father had a successful business, building houses, and motels, and hotels, on the Gold Coast. We joined the church in 1958 when i was 10. My 12th year was spent in Cardston Canada. Parents wanted to go to temple, and live in a church community.
One day my father got a call from SLC, and the whole family of parents and 4 sons went to the UK to build chapels for the church. Usually the building supervisors were retired American builders, who went for 3 years. There was an appropriate allowance for a retired couple.
Someone had decided to build chapels on the assumption the people would come. My father was immediately called as branch president, because there were no other priesthood, and the volunteer labour was a group of teenage girls. There are still about 30 people attending the first of the buildings we built to accommodate 200. We built 2 in Scotland and 1 in England.
It took about 2 years to build a building. So what did this do to my high school education? 3 different countries, 4 different education systems, 3 different languages, and we moved when the building was finished not at the beginning of the school year. Then I was called on a prosyliting mission to Ireland where there was a war between the Catholics, and protestants. The Church was teaching at the time that after a mission you get married (6 weeks) whether you have a job or not (no), whether you are finished your education or not (no), whether you are employable or not (no). The church was also teaching against birth control. So we lived in poverty for the next 10 years. To this stage church callings have been very damaging.
Since then have been on a number of bishopric, never bishop, but acting bishop for a year. Was first councilor, and the bishop went inactive soon after being called, by revelation? So embarrassing to call a replacement. I could only do maintenance management, and with only one councillor. In retrospect I could have done more.
After 65 have not had a calling.
I wonder how many former bishops are reading Wheat&Tares? There was three comments above from bishop s(De Novo, Toad, and Marko) any more of you our there?
Former Bishop x 2 and former SP. I love this site.
Former Bishop here. It’s quite the experience, for sure. Many times I frustrated myself. The longer you are in it, the easier it is to be true to yourself- but the pressure is always there to possibly do things that push against your core values. I hate even making that statement. Very dependent on the values of your SP. That was decades ago- I would be a different Bishop today
My best calling was working in a special branch created by our SP for teenage boys who were out of the juvenile detention system and were now living in a group home on a state mental health provider’s campus. The branch began when our SP went to visit the boys and discovered that neither their bishops, YM leaders or even many of their parents had come to visit since they had been incarcerated and then sent to the group home. This is in Utah County the most uber active Mormon county in Utah and possibly the church! Our SP was so angry about this situation that he petitioned the FP when Hinkley was president to have a special branch for these boys. I had performed at the branch for Easter and Christmas for a couple of years when the Branch President’s wife asked me if I would be in charge of the music for 5 weeks while she and her husband went on a special trip to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. I was thrilled to help out.
The branch had a rinky dink keyboard that only worked on occasion. Taking measures into my own hands I ditched the keyboard and brought my cello instead. The boys loved it and sang louder and with more gusto as a result.
The branch presidency were made up of men in my ward that I knew well plus their wives, our high counselor and me. It helped that we were all good friends and that the three couples had had sons who’d had brushes with the law as teens. It was the perfect group to minister to these young men.
Because of the silly rules about who can and can’t take the sacrament we didn’t have a regular sacrament meeting. We also had Sunday School. Because of the unique situation we were in we as a group decided to ditch the manuals and preach on subjects that we felt were important for the boys to understand. Our mission was to preach of Christ and God, their unconditional love for each boy and how turning over their lives to Christ was the most important thing that they could do to move ahead with their healing and rehabilitation.
I’ve never been in a more sustained spiritual atmosphere than I was in that branch. In the beginning there were only 3 boys who’d earned the right through their behavior at the school they attended and in the group home. There were usually 20 boys in total.
The big change came after our Easter program. Our adult group had prayed that we could reach the boys spirits through their hearts and minds with the talk and the music. Because it was Easter all 20 boys were allowed to attend. The final number was “I Know That My Redeemer Lives” and two of my musician friends and I had put together a beautiful version of the hymn to accompany the singing. From the first phrase until the final word the Spirit descended upon our group and we could hardly sing or play our instruments. Afterwards several of the boys asked us what had just happened because they’d never felt that way before. Several even asked us if we thought angels might have been with us. I personally have no doubt that angels WERE with us! This was one of the greatest spiritual experiences I’ve ever had.
From that time on most of the boys came to meetings with us and had so many wonderful questions to ask us about Jesus and God. For the first time in their lives they felt God’s unconditional love and they also felt forgiven. They truly learned about grace.
We occasionally asked people to come speak to the boys about their own encounters with the sacred. One couple from my ward told me that they felt “body slammed by the Spirit” in our branch. My husband had a similar experience when he also spoke to the boys about how he came to Christ. I looked forward to Sundays at 10:30 more than any other day of the week.
The one sad thing was that because there was no sacrament at our meetings I would go take the sacrament in my own ward. The feeling in my own ward was the 180 degree opposite of the spiritual feast I had in the branch. The ward was devoid of both love and the Spirit. I found myself wanting to stand up and yell, “Wake up people! This is NOT how the body of Christ should act! You’re just going through the motions! If you only knew what REAL worship is!” Finally, the difference between the branch and my ward got to be too painful and I quit showing up to take the sacrament. I also felt badly because I had spent 2 hours in a Spirit filled group to while my husband and son would come home glum and angry after another miserable Sunday at church.
By the time that the branch closed down because the state had farmed the boys out to foster care we’d had 18 boys graduate from the program that was to help rehabilitate them so that they could go home to their families, or, if their parents wouldn’t receive them, a special place where they could live until age 19. Our adult group attended their high school graduations and kept in touch with most of them for several years until they moved away from our county. Even then we texted them for quite some time.
What I did and experienced in that branch was hands down the greatest experience I’ve ever had in the church. I realized what preaching and living Christ’s gospel COULD BE. Upon my return to my own ward I realized how thoroughly devoid of the Spirit my ward and others that I attended were. I feel that this was a major impetus to leave church activity. The Protestant congregation that I now attend feels just like that wonderful branch. If only church members knew what they were missing!
Wayfaring Stranger, thank you for sharing such a wonderful story. If you don’t mind, could you tell us what Protestant congregation you worship with?
Margot, we attend a Presbyterian congregation in Springville, UT.
I’ve enjoyed music callings (primary pianist and ward organist more than once). The best was being primary pianist when my wife was the primary chorister in the first few years of our marriage. We got to hang out together for the whole 3 hours, sing songs, with no lessons to sit through.
I agree that being a financial clerk and having well defined and finite requirements of the job is nice. I’m currently financial clerk for my stake. It’s even better than ward clerk because there’s no tithing to process.
Challenging and not-fun calling: EQ president.
Challenging and more rewarding calling: seminary teacher. That is the most intense calling I’ve ever had, coming up with a lesson to teach 5 days a week. The early mornings were a drag, too, but I thought the unrelenting preparation was more stressful. I don’t imagine many other callings than bishop being more difficult. On the other hand, I liked the kids, and they seemed to respond well. I was well into my post-orthodox stage of belief by then, and I liked being in a position to filter out messages from the manual that I disagreed with.
A Poor Wayfaring Stranger, you are the reason I write on this blog. Its comments like this that keep me coming back.