I watched Conference so you don’t have to. The following short summaries are mine and mine alone. Phrases or sentences within quotation marks are verbatim quotes based on my on-the-fly notes. My comments after summaries are in italics inside brackets [like this]. I offer a paragraph of commentary here and there, including the following introduction.
Introduction: This is a time of troubles. Hundreds of Americans are still dying from Covid every day. Hurricane Ian just drenched a large swath of Florida and is now barreling through the Carolinas. Drought and rolling blackouts in California. Inflation is back, interest rates are rising, the stock market is falling. In the Ukraine War — which is becoming the biggest event of the 21st century the will reverberate through the next three decades — Mr. Putin has just initiated a partial Russian mobilization, spurring protests inside Russia and flight from the country by thousands and thousands of potential conscripts. Just yesterday, Mr. Putin announced the “annexation” of large chunks of captured Ukrainian territory in the east, an action that Ukraine and most other countries reject out of hand, of course. He’s doubling down on a losing plan. Also just yesterday, Pres. Zelensky signed Ukraine’s “accelerated” application for NATO membership. Ukraine’s recent and continued success on the battlefield threatens to undermine Russian stability and prompt desperate measures from a desperate autocrat ruling over a failing regime. World War III could be just around the corner. Will any of these troubling topics be discussed or even mentioned in Conference? I’ll be paying special attention.
Saturday Morning
Pres. Oaks – Give to those in need. Relieve suffering among God’s children. Be more aware and more appreciative of the service of non-LDS people and organizations around the world. [Oaks includes “combatting racism and other prejudices” in the list of LDS humanitarian efforts and accomplishments. Really?]
Elder Uchtdorf – To the youth: Jesus loves you. Fear not, doubt not, let not your heart be troubled. And repent. Where do you find truth? In the Church and the gospel. He announces an updated version of For the Strength of Youth: A Guide for Making Choices. [Here is the link to the new FSOY booklet at LDS.org.]
Tracy Y. Browning, 2C in Primary – Improve your spiritual vision. [She gives a muddled and unfair summary of “the law of Moses” and its purpose in Israelite and later Jewish religious practice, but so do most LDS commentators.]
Elder Renlund – Learn the Holy Ghost framework for receiving personal revelation: search the scriptures, stay in your lane, it has to be in line with LDS view of God’s commandments and what the Church teaches. [His attempt to defend Nephi’s decision to slay Laban and bring it within this framework was not convincing at all. Can we just stop using the Nephi incident as a model for anything?]
Rafael E. Pino, a Seventy – Avoid or abandon traditions and customs that are obstacles to following the Gospel. Develop good gospel customs: scriptures, prayer, sacrament meeting, temple.
Hugo Montoya, a Seventy – Love God and love your neighbor (including strangers). Happiness does not depend on circumstances, it depends on our attitude toward our circumstances.
Elder Rasband – Read the Book of Mormon. A lot. Give a copy or send a link. Flood the Earth.
Pres. Nelson – Many world events since the last Conference. Intensifying efforts of the Adversary. Pres. Nelson speaks strongly against abuse of women and children. Perps will face the wrath of God. States the Church makes great efforts to protect children. The Adversary also tries to blur the line between truth and falsehood. God is the source of all truth and the Church embraces all truth, including science.
Saturday Afternoon
Pres. Eyring – An abbreviated presentation of GAs and officers.
Elder Ballard – There is hope and peace in Christ. Talks about his pioneer ancestors. We’re all pioneers. We have trails to walk and hills to climb.
Kristin M. Yee, 2C in Relief Society – Forgiveness, peace, and healing. She tells the Old Testament story of Abigail, who came out to plead with David on behalf of her husband and household. [She didn’t mention that Abigail later became a wife of David, after the death of Nabal. I see a pattern here.] She quoted from Richard G. Scott’s problematic talk on forgiveness.
Paul V. Johnson, a Seventy – A sad grandchild story with a happy ending. He likens the Atonement to a bone marrow transplant (you can’t save yourself).
Elder Soares – Don’t buy your wife a piano. Be equally yoked. Marriage is a full and equal partnership. Parents work in unity. There is no hierarchy in marriage. Divorced or single parents, that’s a challenge not a problem. [This was an excellent talk!! He directly repudiates the LDS patriarchal marriage model, “I preside and you nurture,” that has dominated LDS thinking for so long.]
James W. McConkie III, a Seventy – Lots of Jesus.
Jorge F. Zeballos, a Seventy – How to design seismic-resistant structures. Be a Satan-resistant person.
Elder Christofferson – The doctrine of belonging. Diversity is coming, even for the Church, even in North America. “We cannot permit racism or tribal prejudice in the Church.” And: “Minister to others who feel like they don’t belong.” [Another outstanding talk. He just made up this “doctrine of belonging,” but I’ll let that slide because it was an outstanding talk. If LDS leaders had given this sort of talk thirty years ago and driven home this message, the Church of today would be a better place. Better late than never.]
Saturday Evening Mystery Session
“Mystery session” because no one can quite figure out what the Saturday evening session is anymore. It used to be the Priesthood session, then it alternated with a Womens session, then it was the Women and Girls session, and now it has just sort of morphed into an extra general session. Because four sessions in two days just isn’t enough. The only difference between the evening session and the others is that the later session only runs 90 minutes.
Gerald Causse, Presiding Bishop – Be a good steward. And procreate.
Michelle D. Craig, 1C in the Young Women – Disciples face challenges. Keep your covenants, even if it’s a tough situation. [I found this talk very disturbing. It’s like she was saying, with no hint of irony, “Be joyful as you suffer.” What some LDS leaders describe as the Great Plan of Happiness, she was depicting as a morass of emotional distress, as if no one deserves to be happy for doing the right thing. Sister Craig seems to be recasting the Covenant Path as the Path of Misery and Pain. Maybe this is just how some LDS women are intent on seeing themselves, always the righteous but suffering victim. The story she told about the little girl whose brothers played a nasty joke on her, but who then woke up in the morning blaming herself for not opening the bedroom door, just encapsulates this whole self-flagellating approach. Her brothers were jerks, but no this young girl didn’t blame her brothers, she blamed herself. I just cringe to think that this talk will probably be a popular one for LDS Relief Society lessons.]
Kevin W. Pearson, a Seventy – “The sacrament is a reminder of the power of the Savior’s Atonement.” [I got Trumper vibes from this guy right away. Turns out he is a member of the Strengthening Church Members Committee, the LDS Star Chamber.]
Denelson Silva, a Seventy – Hold on to the truth. He converted as a young adult.
Elder Anderson – Sort of a Second Coming talk. “We live in increasingly perilous times.” Wheat and tares! [Later, he used the term “tares of the world,” so it appears he was contrasting in-the-Church members with “the World,” rather than using the term “tares” as a reference to wolves-in-sheep’s-clothing members of the Church. He shared some social media responses he received to an earlier online invitation to comment. Hats off to Chris the recovering alcoholic and active LDS member. Best wishes to Anastasia the young Ukranian mother with a newborn in arms.]
Sunday Morning
Introduction to Sunday sessions: Time for some Monday morning quarterbacking, as I quickly add short summaries for the Sunday talks. Speaking of quarterbacks, I had to split my attention between the Bills-Raiders game at 11 am and the second hour of the morning session, then between the 2:25 pm Broncos-Raiders game and the afternoon session. Rather than “choose ye this day which stream to watch,” I have enough screens I was able to watch both the football games and the GA games. I think there were more winners in the football games than in the GA games, but your opinion may differ.
Elder Holland – Story: Young Holland browbeats a fellow religious studies student with the LDS doctrine of Christ. We are not anti-Christ. We are not anti-cross. We are anti-crucifixion. We don’t need no stinking crosses!
J. Anette Dennis, 1C in Relief Society – “A story is told …” It sure would be nice if the stories told in Conference were *actual* stories rather than the made-up stories like the ones that show up in LDS manuals. The story of Cassie the dog sure sounded like a made-up story. [Plus her delivery made me feel like a 5-year-old sitting on the floor listening to story time. Tell me the story of Cassie the dog!]
Elder Gong – “Happily ever after …” It can happen to you. It can happen to me. It can happen to everyone eventually.
Joseph W. Sitati, used to be a Seventy – Humbly rails against people who aren’t meek and humble. God was right to strike down Korihor the Unbeliever. King Benjamin was right to preach against hard-hearted enemies of God (i.e., people who believe differently than I do). [More dog whistles encouraging political and religious violence for LDS Trumpo-fascists.]
Steven J. Lund, a Seventy – A testimony of FSY and Girls Camp.
Elder Bednar – Darth Bednar on parables, in particular the parable of the royal marriage feast. Garments, garments, garments. You gotta wear the right garments or God’s thugs will throw you out of the marriage feast into Outer Darkness. Many are called but few are chosen. Dress for salvation success. [Alternate summary: By grace ye are not saved, after all the things you didn’t do.]
Pres. Nelson – We are accosted daily by an onslaught of sobering news. [Bonus points: First talk to acknowledge this time of troubles.] But — there are wonderful things ahead. Miracles for the faithful. Making and keeping covenants makes everything easier. Easier, but never easy — we will overwork you and you will be tired and you won’t get rest until the next life. But please don’t leave the Church just because you are overloaded, overworked, and exhausted.
Sunday Afternoon
[Speaking of overloaded and exhausted, here we go headed into the fifth general session in two days. Memo to leaders: Less is more!]
Pres. Eyring – Talked about something. [“Qualify for salvation”? Whatever happened to grace? Need more Uchtdorf.]
Ryan K. Olsen, a Seventy – Know Christ. [He may be the youngest Seventy, but he has already learned to tell family stories in Conference.]
Jonathan S. Schmitt, a Seventy – There are many names of Christ. Pick one and emulate it. [I thought of the Arthur C. Clarke story The Nine Billion Names of God.]
Mark D. Eddy, a Seventy – All about Zoramites. [You know the phrase “kiss the ring”? New GAs need to kiss the historical and authentically ancient Book of Mormon.]
Elder Stevenson – On testimony. A testimony is “sharing spiritual feelings.” [Honest, that’s what he said. Maybe the LDS testimony template is moving from “I know” to “I feel.” Get ready for “I feel the Church is true” and “I feel the Book of Mormon is true” from the pulpit in testimony meeting.]
Isaac K. Morrison, a Seventy – A truly sad story about him losing a young son. [Mourn with those who mourn.]
Elder Cook – Don’t be one of those “not valiant” people. Don’t be angry. Those who are abusers will one day face the wrath of God [but tend to get a free pass from their local leaders in this life, go figure]. Don’t lust. No unclean thoughts. Obligatory porn denunciation. [A downer talk to end a downer Conference.]
Pres. Nelson – A plug for the LDS Book of Mormon videos (I didn’t even know this was a thing). New temples for Korea, Philippines x 2, Nigeria, Peru, Argentina, Brazil x 2, Guatemala, Jacksonville, Grand Rapids, Texas, Nevada, Tacoma, and four (!!) new temples near Mexico City.
Conclusion: How about we just get rid of the Saturday evening session? How about we also get rid of the Sunday afternoon session? Overall, it was Just. Too. Long. If there is a one-sentence summary of this Conference, I would go with: “This is what Retrenchment feels like.” I’ll probably do a Conference Recap post later this week, with highlights (Soares and Christofferson) and lowlights (everyone else).
Wheat & Tares 
The Saturday morning session of General Conference is not even over yet. You’re missing quite a bit.
Yeah, I really wish Elder Renlund had just stopped when he correctly stated that simple explanations are not sufficient to explain the Nephi/Laban episode. It’s a problematic story, and any effort to justify it merely emboldens others who believe they get divine revelation to kill people. (Like Lafferty, Daybell, and others…)
Thanks for this! I caught about 10 minutes of Elder Renlund’s talk and got to hear him explain why it was okay for Nephi to kill Laban. Yeah, probably best to leave that out. He was really clear that the prophets have veto power over our personal revelation. I guess that’s to counter people who say they’ve prayed about topics and gotten promptings that go contrary to the Church’s teachings. *cough* LGBTQ issues *cough*
Sister Browning is the first black woman to speak at a general conference. That’s the good news. But… it’s 2022.
I noted that Oaks was *assigned* to talk about humanitarian efforts. I liked that Uchtdorf was very Christ centered while rolling out the FSOY pamphlet, and I was pleased to see Sister Browning, as Toad remarked. I checked out for the 70s speeches. Cringed with each “Beloved” and “Dear” when referencing Pres. Nelson. Enough, already.
Sounds boring, but that’s pretty much a win when it comes to GC.
@Janey. I was struggling to explain my main problem with E. Renlund’s talk, and your “veto” idea seems to be a simple (maybe too simple??) description of the problem I had with it. IMO, the church struggles with the whole idea of “prophetic fallibility.” Eventually, we will disavow past teachings after it becomes glaringly obvious that those teachings were wrong, but we never (royal church “we” here, because groups like W&T are frequently addressinig it) address how the historic precedent applies to current teachings. IMO, until E. Renlund is willing to append a real discussion of prophetic fallibility and how historic precedent applies to current teachings, these kind of talks will always be incomplete.
A few months ago one of Bishop Bills articles was highlighted in the SL Trib. This week Elisa had a whole article featured from this blog. There is more insight to the actual church member sentiment on WT than found in any GC talk.
In Elder Renlund’s defense, my inactive daughter listened to his talk from the dining room and asked if it was his way of warning people about false personal revelations that Q-anon is a righteous movement. It certainly applies, so I can’t say that her interpretation does not reflect Renlund’s meaning. But, on the other hand, no Q-anon follower was going to recognize him- or herself in that talk.
It was a rather odd sensation for me going from Rasband’s prophet worship to Nelson positing from the Arizona abuse case to the difficulty in discerning truth (I took this as permission to doubt the media reports and the necessity to trust the church’s account). The part about scientific truth just felt awkward and seemed to me more like a dig at the fact that BYU couldn’t corroborate the Duke volleyball players story. Then I followed the Soares talk about the patriarchal order by telling the Adam and Eve story and turned to CNN to see a story about a million year old human skull discovered in China determined to be the missing link. I just couldn’t do it anymore after that. The thing that bothered me most about Soares talk is that it’s still the patriarchal order. Doesn’t matter how many times you say men and women are equal when you’re still calling it the patriarchal order.
In light of Nate Omen’s recent essay, this gem from the new FTSOY pamphlet is timely: ” The law of chastity states that God approves of sexual activity only between a man and a woman who are married. Many in the world ignore or even mock God’s law, but the Lord invites us to be His disciples and live a standard higher than the world’s.”
I particularly like the last sentence. It’s good reminder to ignore the Progmos who slander members as various types of -ists and -phobes if they believe in the Lord’s revealed law of chastity.
But we know that Nephi was correct in killing Laban because he didn’t start out with that goal and because he was *confident* that’s what he was supposed to do.
Isn’t there like one person who could critically review conference talk before they give them and point out when they say something that doesn’t make and sense at all?
Yes @danyal, what a unique reminder. We progmo’s keep forgetting what Church teachings on homosexuality are. If we only remembered, we’d certainly fall in line.
This is why it is so effective for the church to continue to harp on it.
Thanks for the comments, everyone.
I now have all the Saturday sessions (three of them!) posted. I’ll follow with the Sunday sessions when I get a chance. It’s kind of a hit-and-miss Conference so far.
The church has lost any claim of being in touch with reality or of being led by God
I believe that there are two types of church talks: problem solvers and problem causers. I am afraid that Sister Craig’s talk will be a problem causer.
Miscellaneous talk summaries from me:
Oaks: Good talk on humanitarian and charitable donations and on recognizing the good everybody else does too. Loses points for its continued element of surprise that we aren’t the only good people in the world, and for a cryptic reference at the end to “supporting morality” that probably means “and anti-queer stuff.”
Uchtdorf: All this sweet talk about Jesus is just me trying to butter you up for our new highly correlated FSOY pamphlet, straight from Jesus’ mouth to you! Step right up, folks, this one is straight from God himself! What would Jesus do? He would read this pamphlet and then he would tell you how great you all are, everybody! (Never mind that previous editions of FSOY have demonstrably been culturally-bound committee-sourced artifacts.) A disappointing departure from form for Uchtdorf.
Browning: Good analogy of needing glasses to needing spiritual clarity. Touching testimony. Loses points for its vague anti-semitism, but only to a very small degree because Christianity as a whole has long struggled with that.
Renlund: Church organization and revelations are like aviation regulations and air traffic control. Stay in your lane. Personal revelation means you can make decisions about your own life like any reasonable, normal, person, but you’re not allowed to have any un-Correlated opinions or thoughts of your own about any doctrinal matters. Definitely means you’re not allowed to not go to Church (meaning the LDS Church) on Sunday. Oh, and un-premeditated murder that just really feels like a good idea at the time isn’t a sin, y’all. [A very problematic talk, starting with the analogy at the start. I could go on but I won’t.]
Pino: It’s ok if stuff people in other cultures do feels weird to you. Stuff you do feels weird to them too. Let’s just all be nice to each other and go to church. [I liked this one.]
Montoya: The two great commandments are love God and love your neighbor, but I’m not going to make a distinction between the two. Just be nice to people. [I liked this one.]
Rasband: Wheee, look at me, I get to give engraved Books of Mormon to important people and take photo ops! It’s so fun, y’all should do it too! Everybody sing Follow the Prophet with me! [Loses points for referring to the African tribal king as just “the Africal tribal king”, colonial-style, rather than naming his tribe and using his title. Maybe there’s legal reasons for keeping it vague.]
Nelson: Much-needed condemnation of abuse. Much-needed exhortation that we believe in science, too. Much-repeated statement that sometimes it’s hard to tell what the facts are, so don’t actually trust the science too much. Watching him on the TV, I didn’t know he was sitting on a stool – I’m impressed he only needed a very small, bare, tall stool to help him at the podium despite his extreme age, unlike speakers like Packer who used to need to be wheeled up to the podium ensconced in their huge red armchairs.
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Eyring: The usual forgettable formality. Your vote doesn’t mean anything in General Conference.
Ballard: Pioneer is a noun and a verb. You can do hard things. We’re all in this together. Going on a mission is hard, you can be proud of it. [I usually find Ballard’s talks a bit problematic, but I liked this one.]
Yee: Abigail is a type of Christ when she takes David a whole bunch of stuff. [I thought this was a real big stretch.]
Johnson: Accepting Christ changes your very being, the way a bone marrow transplant changes the very DNA in your blood. We all need God’s help for this change, none of us can do it on our own – nor are we expected to. [Apart from the gruesome nature of the medical analogy, I quite liked this talk. It was focused on Christ’s atonement in a spiritual, universal sense.]
Soares: An excellent talk about equality in marriage that I think I’m going to re-read many times. Too bad he still thought he had to use the word “patriarchal,” but at least he made a good effort to redefine it into meaning something other than what it actually means.
McConkie: I’m a better biblical scholar than you and I’m such a super devout mission president and my missionaries are all super devout and we’re having such amazing spiritual experiences cause we know Jesus so well. [At first I thought his tone was kind of obnoxious, but I didn’t actually mind any of the things he was saying about Jesus once I got past the probably unwitting holier-than-thou tone.]
Zeballos: Uchtdorf gets to talk about his job in his past life so I do too. I was a civil engineer who designed (or at least took a class on) earthquake-resistant buildings. There’s a spiritual analogy in there somewhere. Civil engineering is cool too! [I liked this talk.]
Christofferson: Since none of you get to make up your own doctrine, I’ll do it for you, and the doctrine is this: yes, the early Church was mostly white people of European extraction, but the Church today is not. Racism and prejudice of any kind of no place in the Church. None of this is new, but my term for it (“the doctrine of belonging”) is. Can’t we all just get along? [I usually find Christofferson’s talks a bit problematic, but I liked this one.]
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Causse: God wants us to take care of the environment! No, wait, God wants us to be creative and make things! No, wait, God wants us all to have babies! I don’t know what I’m trying to say! Go have fun and do whatever you want, just clean up after yourselves if you make a mess, and don’t make messes! [This talk started out well, but quickly went off the rails, especially when he quoted Monson to say that God left the forests un-felled so we could fell them ourselves, etc. Are you trying to encourage environmental preservation, or environmental exploitation, bishop Causse?]
Craig: A cruel prank played by dumb teenage boys in my family on their little sister. Sometimes when life plays tricks on us we need to make the effort to see past the prank and find out that thiings aren’t as bad as they seem. [A very sad story and a very sad talk, but a sensible no-nonsense approach to life. It wasn’t a perfect talk, but the core message was in the right place.]
Pearson: Remember when Renlund said you don’t get to not go to Church on Sunday just because you think you get more spiritual value being out in nature? Yeah, if you don’t take the Sacrament every Sunday and think really, really hard super super deep deep devout worshipful thoughts during the Sacrament every time, y’all’s going to h***. All you PIMOs on the blogosphere are going to h***. I’m dropping cane [a phrase on my mission, bajando la cana] so hard on y’all right now. You don’t get to think for yourself, ever, because then y’all’s going DOWN, you heretics.
Silva: A nice talk by a nice guy who had a really nice experience with the missionaries in his youth. So much joy radiates from him through his talk. I liked this talk a lot.
Anderson: Wheat and tares. The world is such a bad place, guys, no really, it really is. Let’s be the wheat not the tares. Social media open mic time: good luck to the new mother in Ukraine, we’re all rooting for you.
Danyal – I’m quite positive many members that held tight to the church’s stance on race issues in the 60’s and 70’s found “gems” uttered by church leaders all the time to justify their racism. They were probably offended by the more thoughtful, reasonable (progmos) who were rejecting the “Lord’s revealed” stance on black people. They probably even felt slandered against. In the end, they were still racists and the Lord’s leaders were dead wrong.
Thanks for the outline. I went from listening to every session of conference to just reading summaries like these. Usually I will go listen to all the ones that people I trust say were good. I have learned to enjoy conference better by just reading two or three good talks.
Kevin Pearson is our Dolores Umbridge.
Also problematic in Renlund’s talk, the story that was transparently intended to parallel Joseph Smith’s story, that was then dismissed by fiat as obviously being false and worthless, not worth praying about. I agree that the man in the story was a crank who didn’t deserve the time of day, but the argument Renlund used to dismiss him in the talk was basically exactly the same as the arguments used by the various ministers in the Joseph Smith story to dismiss the First Vision and Book of Mormon as nonsense. Prayers about truth for me and not for thee. That story certainly underscored the essentially authoritarian thesis of Renlund’s talk, and I understand why he included it given the long history of self-proclaimed prophets splintering off of the Mormon tradition, but it was just one more messy part of a long, messy, frequently self-contradictory address.
Many thanks @ Dave B and @ Pontius Python on the Cliff Notes – so helpful and insightful. There may be a couple I’ll go read at some point. And what happened to Renlund? I had high hopes from him early on but maybe he’s been assigned to double down on folk questioning? He comes across as so dismissive. I actually turned on conference this morning but just couldn’t continue.
A few of my reactions:
Oaks – Puttin’ points on the scoreboard, something Mormons love. Great. How about insight into our charitable goals as a church? How about a prospectus for charitable giving? Why not share what our strategy is and what measurable difference it is making? There is nothing forward looking here, no accomplishment against stated objectives. A post hoc report presumably to show critics of church money hording that its doing great things so stop asking questions. How about full financial transparency, Dallin?
Uchtdorf – Is it just me or does it seem like his mojo has been knocked down? He is such a powerful leader. It’s too bad he has been shoved into the basement of correlation. I will give him props for advocating more of a principled, independent decision-making model. Still, what a loss. About 10 years ago an non-member executive with whom I had worked for many years attended a function for SLC area business leaders. Then president Uchtdorf, Elder Ballard and Elder Cook were in attendance. It was as a relatively small group, maybe 30 business leaders, most of them non-members. My friend’s take away following the event: “After Ballard finished insulting my protestant faith, he was nice to talk to. Cook seemed uncomfortable and only wanted to talk about corporate law, but Uchtdorf. Wow. That man is the future of your church.” Maybe? There is still time.
Renlund – Hummm…this is why we need Mormon theology.
Browning – To be celebrated, but so long overdue.
Nelson – All defense. Little offense. Outrage but no expression of institutional change or action. We embrace all truth, but evidently not the ongoing and overwhelming scientific evidence that coffee has big health benefits. I checked in on the new FTSY changes. A paragraph focuses on doing things that strengthen your body–good. But also warns against that which is not good for your body or spirit, which includes, evidently, coffee and tea. We may embrace all truth, including scientific truth, but don’t ask us to update old rules that can be traced to the whims prior church leaders. The Word of Wisdom is not so much a law of health as it is a law of obedience because there is no other way to justify all of the WoW’s current prohibitions.
Soares – Will be interesting to see how the most junior apostles like Soares and Gong develop over time. Great message.
Craig – Cringey. Glad my daughters were not listening to this session.
Pearson – This guys scares the hell out of me. Isn’t he also over the Office of Ecclesiastical Clearance? And isn’t he the one who recently gave a fire and brimstone talk at the Alpine Tabernacle about how young men are “obligated” to serve missions as a condition of their baptismal covenants? He focused on the fact those who serve missions produce 8 tithe paying members within two generations compared to .8 tithe payers for those who do not. So the reasons for serving are clear, duh? (Way to put that data sciences professional career and Harvard MBA to good use–when all you have is a hammer everything looks like a nail.) Correct me if I am wrong because I’m pulling from recent memory.
So mostly boring and repetitive with a good helping of insufferable and a couple nuggets of actual enlightened speech. Sounds like about every other conference I remember. And sorry, I’m done fawning over the small nuggets of enlightenment. Cringeworthy Phariseeism characterizes most of my upbringing in Mormonism. It still remains strong and is deeply embedded in a good many of the conference talks. Enlightened nuggets are few and far between.
Holland: Meaning no disrespect whatsoever to faithful Christians who use the symbol of the cross, we don’t use it and this is why. I like this talk. One of Holland’s best talks in years.
Dennis: Sad, sad story about a wounded dog. Seek to understand the wounds and trauma of people who seem like they’re acting out, then try to help and heal. I like this talk. Simple New Testament Christianity of love, charity, and not judging. Maybe the best talk of this Conference so far. Some Nelson quotes, but not egregiously extensive, and well chosen in context.
Gong: Relationships and life are complicated, joy and pain together. Happiness in eternal life is God’s goal for us. What if you don’t want to be sealed to someone in your family? Please give them the chance and do their temple work, and let God sort out the healing in the eternities. I like this talk at the start. It takes a humble, charitable rather than triumphant, obligatory approach to temple work. “A bent branch does not mean a bad tree. How we come into this world is less important than how we leave it.” Repentance and obedience are important, forgiveness too. “A thousand millennial years when Satan is bound may give us plenty of time to understand and work things out.”
Sitati: We can’t change eternal laws to suit ourselves. Day and night happen to everyone. Jet lag sucks. Don’t be Korihor. Don’t be proud. Love God and others, do service.
Lund: Sales talk for FSY conferences. You’re gonna lose your testimony if you don’t watch out, so step right up to our paid Mormon version of Vacation Bible School! (Aside, we acknowledge that sometimes just going to sacrament meeting can be a real drag.) Bonus for telling a story about his wife’s stake YW calling, with him supporting her. Smiling friendly talk, he seems like a nice guy.
Bednar: Parables are cool, y’all. Imma tell y’all what a parable is. It’s Jesus talking in code so that y’all won’t have any idea what he’s talking about. That means y’all’s gotta take my word for it about what he was trying to say. Parable of the wedding feast. When the king says come to the feast it’s not an invitation, it’s a command, when you don’t come it’s an insult, it’s rebellion, you’re scum and you’re going DOWN. The wedding guests from the street who didn’t have the wedding garment got theirs from the king’s personal wardrobe but still didn’t wear them, so they’re super duper evil. Reading all sorts of details and intentions and events into the story that aren’t in the actual text, blah blah blah blah blah. Choose to be chosen, by obedience etc. Something something grace too. A sentence contending for the Neal A Maxwell Alliteration Award!
Nelson: I think about y’all, all the time. So does God. Bad news all the time is depressing, but don’t worry, there are miracles in the future for the faithful. Does the temple journey symbolize the challenges of life? Of course it does. Rest for your souls in the temple. It makes life easier, it doesn’t ask too much of you, so it makes me really sad when you leave because of that. Jesus overcame the world, you can too with his help. Please, please, just be nice to people. Love God and Jesus more than you love anyone or anything else. Power, popularity, possessions don’t bring happiness – another contender for the Maxwell Award. Please take charge of your own testimony of Jesus, but don’t listen to all those other people. A nice blessing to everybody at the end. [I like this Overcoming the World talk better than last conference’s Spiritual Momentum talk, I got tired of that one real quick. But the part about loving God more than you love any one else ties into the Oaks 1/2 distinction that I don’t like. And the part about taking charge of your own testimony at first sounds like something I agree with, but then he dilutes it with the usual caveats, so basically stay in the walled garden and like it.]
Pontius for the comment wins! Love this additional take on things.
Just want to highlight some very encouraging trends. There has been a female speaker at every session, and we’ve had two additional women give prayers. Also, the female auxiliary presidents have been introduced as “President X” rather than “Sister X.”
I noticed the increase in female speakers as well.
Eyring: Strive to qualify to return to Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. Life is a test. Depend on the Savior. Lots of quotes from Mormon and Moroni. Apparently ordinary human beings can make all the high-sounding Mormon/Moroni/Paul ideals into living reality. Many of you know people like that. Many of you are people like that. Covenants are not meant to control you, but to help you live a holier, more charitable life. [Eyring can be boring, but I always appreciate his boundless faith in the goodness of individual people.]
Olsen: We’re friends of Jesus if we do what he asks us to. Q15 are nice to Q70. Gratuitous Nelson quote and recurring Mormon folklore about how special this particular generation of youth is. The answer to everything is Jesus. [Cute rhetoric, but not meant literally.] “The Gospel of Jesus Christ” missionary lesson. Good use of “mission leaders” to refer to him and his wife in Uruguay, with one slip up. Perfectionist missionaries, don’t be too hard on yourselves. You’re good enough, you’ve got this. Nelson quote that God communicates so simple and plainly you can’t possibly misunderstand him. God is the master of simplicity, the answer is Jesus. [Then why do we make the Plan of Salvation and the temples and the ordinances so complicated? Why doesn’t everyone in the world believe the same things about deity and the afterlife? It’s a cute slogan, but the only simple thing common to religion everywhere is the Golden Rule. Is there really anything else to understand?]
Schmitt: Jesus has many names, which one should I take upon me this week? [That’s a take on the sacrament prayers I haven’t heard before!] It’s rude to forget someone’s name or call them by a different name. [So how about those pronouns and name changes?] But it’s alright if Jesus calls you by a different name, that’s not rude at all. Know the 300+ names of Jesus [so you can feed them into a supercomputer and bring about the end of the world? You’re about 8,999,999,700 short!] Good shepherd. Ministering by text doesn’t really count. The Same Yesterday Today And Forever. [That’s not a name, that’s an adjectival phrase. Most of the listed names of God are adjective phrases. But you write it in capital letters and add The at the start, and suddenly it’s a name. In my opinion, that’s not good grammar.]
Eddy: Hi Eddy! I like your name. Boo, Zoramites. Nice sermons to them though. The word of God is good stuff. Jesus is the Word too. Words of apostles and prophets come from God.
[Say the word and you’ll be free
Say the word and be like me
Say the word I’m thinking of
Have you heard the word is love?
It’s so fine, it’s sunshine
It’s the word, love
In the beginning I misunderstood
But now I’ve got it, the word is good
Spread the word and you’ll be free
Spread the word and be like me
Spread the word I’m thinking of
Have you heard the word is love?
It’s so fine, it’s sunshine
It’s the word, love
Every where I go I hear it said
In the good and bad books that I have read
Say the word and you’ll be free
Say the word and be like me
Say the word I’m thinking of
Have you heard the word is love?
It’s so fine, it’s sunshine
It’s the word, love
Now that I know what I feel must be right
I’m here to show everybody the light
Give the word a chance to say
That the word is just the way
It’s the word I’m thinking of
And the only word is love
It’s so fine, it’s sunshine
It’s the word, love
Say the word love
Say the word love
Say the word love
Say the word love
The Beatles, The Word, Rubber Soul, 1965]
Stevenson: “Defining moments in life come often and unexpectedly, even when early in life.” Tells a story about a teenager at a leadership conference who has to say yup, I’m a Mormon. Except he doesn’t actually say that, obviously. Good story, the kid makes a lot of friends, gives away a Book of Mormon to someone who actually asks for one. The kid is now a bishop in Indiana. Then talks about Testimony in the Church sense of the word, the Five Parts of a Testimony as once defined by some other apostle in the past who he doesn’t cite. “You bear your testimony when you share your spiritual feelings with others.” [I like that sentence. It’s a simple, no-nonsense, non-prescriptive, non-Correlated definition of “bearing your testimony” that I can actually get behind.] Go on a mission, kids. When you don’t know what to say, just say over and over that Joseph Smith was a prophet [and if you say it enough you’ll believe it]. Oaks quote, echoing Packer, that a testimony is found more often when bearing it than when praying for it [the fake it til you make it model of testimony bearing, which has never seemed entirely honest to me]. Scriptures, prayer, obedience, sacrament, temple, family history to keep your testimony. “Make your testimony your highest priority.” [Yeah, like everything is also supposed to be our highest priority. How many separate things did Joseph Smith were most important, at one time or another? Half a dozen? Priorities in life are not a quantified well-ordered set. I can forgive the sloppy rhetoric though, it’s mostly harmless.]
Morrison: Many of life’s challenges don’t come because of sin. They are opportunities to grow. Marriage and children are a sacred challenge. Sad story about the accidental drowning of an infant son. Two rules to never break: listen to and heed the promptings of your wife, see rule one. We can have peace and good cheer in tough times through Jesus Christ. Go Ghana Cape Coast Mission!
Cook: Q12 missionary buds just chillin’ in the UK, fun fun fun! Nineteenth century persecution quotes. [Spoken to people who were soon to be heavily persecuted for polygamy.] The Moon is just borrowed light, like a borrowed testimony. Get your own testimony. Anger and lust are bad. Physical abuse is bad. Whether or not anybody abused you, do not abuse other people. Don’t use abusive language on the internet either. Repent of impure thought so they don’t grow into improper actions.
Nelson: Did you take conference notes? [First time in my life!] Season 4 of Book of Mormon video series. 3 Nephi 11 clip. [Much smaller Bountiful temple than in The Testaments, which is better, I guess. The new Jesus has a more dynamic preacher voice than the previous Monson-era Jesus, who had such a soft flat affect that it was hard to understand a word he said.] Temples are good! Lots of temples everywhere are great. 168 operating temples, 53 under construction, 54 in design phase, I’m announcing 18 more: four of them in the Mexico City metro area alone! [And a Buenos Aires City Center temple. That one’s not a burned out tabernacle!] God be with you til we meet again.
Is it just me or are the temple announcements getting to be a bit passé? With over 50 yet to break ground, it feels like we’re adding to a list that will never be completed.
Why, oh why, is the content so banal? Nothing says prophet like a cliche
I thought it an interesting choice to have Brad Wilcox give a prayer. Felt like a statement of solidarity.
I didn’t watch or listen to most of it, but if there was a talk on casting for the environment that may have a good thing. It is something I’ve been wanting to heat for a long time.
Yes, personally I felt having Uchtdorf give a talk about the new strength for youth booklet was a waste of talent. He’s well loved and we miss hearing from him.
p.s. Uchtdorf will be loved as prophet as much as Gordon B. Hinckley and as dynamic. Just hope I’m alive to see it.
Is it just me, or is Elder Bednar getting more and more vicious as time goes on? It felt like he was telling us all that if we don’t show up “appropriately dressed” to God – He won’t accept us. I know it was meant figuratively – but he seems to take joy in pointing out the different ways we can be shunned by God. Yeah, it’s probably just me.
@Cam, I honestly believe the viciousness has been there the whole time. Don’t have time to catalog all the instances, but there are plenty of examples of him saying such things. And definitely did them before his tenure as Q12 as well. But yes, it does not bode well for the future, which, if I recall correctly, someone predicted as him being president of the Church for a long time.
Did anyone catch the repeated use of the phrase “holy habits and righteous rituals?” It was used twice in this conference by my count. Where does it come from?
Did anyone catch the repeated use of the phrase “holy habits and righteous rituals?” It was used twice in this conference by my count. Where does it come from?
I think people are missing a key element of Bednar’s talk. His formulation of “choose to be chosen,” which implies action on our parts, is a huge improvement over the passive “we are the chosen,” which far too many still believe in their hearts. But of course those who believe that everybody should be chosen will be disappointed.
kmarkp. Here is the answer to your question. Apparently a favorite phrase of President Oaks, although not original with him and somewhat changed.
https://rsc.byu.edu/vol-9-no-2-2008/holy-habits-righteous-routines
When I realized where Holland’s talk was going, I groaned. It feels like it’s been some time since our collective vampire-like aversion to the cross has been stoked, and I had honestly hoped they might be letting the subject quietly die. Just three days prior, I had my son hide a cross in his drawers because my brother and SIL were visiting.
@Not a Cougar, I find the temple announcements to be more than a bit passé. In many of the places temples are announced, am I the only one who wonders why we’re announcing temples being built in places either ruled by murderous, half-crazed dictators (Russia, Dubai) or, particularly in the case of Africa, in the most impoverished, repressed places in the world? I’m not surprised that that Rasband couldn’t name the King of Lesotho. If he knew too much about the Apartheid created Kingdom, he might have to find out that there are more rapes per capita than any other country in the world, and about the accompanying AIDS/HIV epidemic. And the crushing poverty of the people who are not from the royal family. Then Rasband might have wondered why our wealthy church could do nothing to mitigate the suffering, beyond giving the king an engraved Book of Mormon. Then there was the mention of meeting the equally nameless President of Mozambique, who got not only an engraved Book of Mormon, but a shiny new temple! A BofM in his “native” tongue of Portuguese (Was that stealth on Elder Rasband’s part–he wanted to evoke the rapacious colonization of one of the last countries to achieve independence on the continent?). He did mention the poverty, political instability etc. I just don’t understand why a new temple is better than food, clothes, shelter, education, environmental protection, and sustainable employment.
Englecameron,
I think you raise some great points. But since you currently have 21 thumbs up, and no thumbs down (other than mine), perhaps I can push back a little? Your viewpoint sounds very much like a classic, well-meaning Westerner’s reaction to “poverty porn.” Assuming that you reside in the United States, and are not actually African, Russian, or Arab (if you are, more power to you) – is your list of items based on what the intended recipients of the church’s aid have expressed, or based mostly on what you think they need? Could it be possible that church members in these “impoverished, repressed places” actually want a temple? That they’ve prayed for a temple? Or that it’s God will? I actually don’t know the answers to these things. Perhaps we could ask those folks? Or God? Perhaps the leaders of the Church in Africa know their flock?
If I were Master of the Universe, my inclination would be to allow church members in those places much more autonomy to direct church money to what they think they need. Perhaps it’s a temple. Perhaps it’s “food, clothes, shelter…” It’s all complicated by risks of graft and corruption (not only in these countries, but anywhere…giving huge lump sums of money to ‘leaders’ to distribute often doesn’t turn out too well…though I admit that seems to be the model Church Headquarters runs by!). And even if money is given to such areas to spend on their own priorities, who there decides on the priorities? The Area Authority? Stake President? Bishop? Relief Society? Or do the church members vote on it? There are always going to be people who think such and such money would have been better spent on XYZ.
A totally separate point is that the Church does not run these countries – it’s not going to single handedly change the rapes per capita, political instability, or sustainable employment. Literally trillions of dollars have been spent by Western countries addressing some of these things, with decidedly mixed results (read books by William Easterly). The church’s impact on these things would be miniscule at best. And let’s not forget the thousands of church members in those countries–including ex-pats–some of whom dedicate effort to address items on your list of problems. Perhaps the temple is there to rejuvenate them spiritually, so their other efforts bear greater fruit? Or perhaps in building temples, you stimulate economic activity, thereby bringing gains in “food, clothes, shelter,…”
I don’t know. I hope God does. I’m inactive, and as such, obviously not a temple goer, nor a robotic cheerleader for temple construction. But just as one can be too simplistic in cheerleading temple construction, one can also be too simplistic in critiquing it.
Bednar’s talk was concerning to me because he expounded a sacred context—the Wedding Feast—but focused on the harsher aspect—the binding and casting out of an imposter, instead of the celebratory aspect: that so many commoners were invited to the great feast, and that they clothed themselves in royal robes of glory, partaking of the covenant for proximity to the King. Almost felt like he employed fear [as a tool], instead of faith.