Nate’s post this week refers to balancing masculine/feminine dualities, and it got me thinking about a book my sister-in-law had me read last year. I don’t know if you’ve heard about “energy profiling,” apparently it’s a thing in Utah because Carol Tuttle, a Mormon woman, has developed her own business with an online class that helps people discover their type of energy and empowers them to live true to their natures and quit trying to be something they are not. I believe energy profiling is based on the eastern thought of the four elements and balancing the yin and yang. Everyone has the four energies in them but we all lead with only one of them. You can find a large infographic that has more info on how the yin and yang are mixed among the different types HERE.
It looks like a lot of the other personality profiling systems with four types out there but I found this to be more helpful and accurate. It is also not without it’s critics. What I wanted to focus on is this quote from one of her books describing growing up Mormon:
“When I was growing up, the culture I was raised in depicted feminine nature as soft, gentle, and sensitive. Not only were women soft and gentle, they were also more subdued, cute and perky. Men, on the other hand, in their masculine nature, were more aggressive and bold. We have been depicting women and men with these stereotypical qualities for centuries. The subtle, soft feminine alone can no longer be culturally acceptable or supportive to the different types of women in the world….[if you don’t live true to your nature] your needs never get met, because you continue to hide your true nature.” (Discover your Type of Beauty, Carol Tuttle, p. 41-2; emphasis added)
Carol Tuttle, as a type three, describes the feelings of inadequacy she experienced growing up as her type two mother constantly told her to settle down, be quiet, and to act like a girl. She found acceptance and authenticity when she came to embrace who she was and her type of intense, dynamic femininity. It can be an empty, soul draining experience to deny your true nature and try to live as another. Each type has different strengths and weaknesses, needs and motivations. In the book she recognizes it can be especially difficult for type three women and type two men to be themselves and maintain their self worth in highly gender-roled environments because their gifts (on the yin/yang spectrum) have been classified as opposite in masculine/feminine spectrum, whereas type ones and fours have an more balanced yin and yang. More detail on the yin/yang HERE.
Growing up Mormon has not always been easy for me. I’m an epic failure at so many stereotypical Relief Society skills. I hate crafting, cooking, baking, homemaking, home decorating, makeup, fashion, etc. I really couldn’t care less about what I look like or what people think of me; in other words I’d rather be known as brilliant than beautiful. I love to do lists and accomplishing things; growing up this manifested in sports and academics. I love reading, writing, economics, politics, and deep discussions about complex topics. I enjoy children, but believe that’s more my action/reaction nature that I can be silly and get kids to laugh and follow me (to get my child to do chores I pretended I was a cat) than the fact that I’m super gentle and nurturing. I grew up with the paradigm woman = mother and men = priesthood. In my FamHist class at Ricks my teacher said a man’s eternal purpose is to govern and a woman’s eternal purpose is to nurture. That’s why men get more wives, it’s just more to govern; a woman can’t have two husbands because she’d then have two governors. (sigh) The genders were so distinct in purpose and role that when motherhood wasn’t in my cards, it messed with my head when the path God gave me didn’t match my supposed “purpose” in life.
My journey with personal revelation, infertility, feminism, and even energy profiling has enabled me to accept myself over the last few years in a way that the gendered teachings at church had never allowed me to. I now define my womanhood and embrace my femininity on my own terms. My femininity isn’t found in my motherhood, my dismal homemaking skills, in gentility and nurturing, or in skirts and high heels. My femininity is my own unique mix of traits, talents, characteristics, and even my unique yin/yang.
This past weekend the Oscars were held on Sunday night and there was a movement to #AskHerMore (asking actresses about more than just their clothes). BuzzFeed participated by asking a number of women about what piece of advice they would give young women, the video can be found here. One of my favorite pieces of advice was “How To Get Away With Murder” star Viola Davis’ comment:
There are many reasons I push back at stereotypical gendered teachings in and out of the church. This is one of the many reasons, it causes feelings of inadequacy and failure in ways that can damage your mental health. It took a blessed answer to prayer for Heavenly Father to teach me He does not want me to fill a role. He made me with my unique talents and skills to build the kingdom. So, you be you. You are a unique mix of yin and yang, embrace it and use it.
Have your heard of this profiling system? It’s pretty popular in Rexburg. I was just at a birthday party last night and about 1/3 of the women have read and used it. Have you found any other type of personality system that you prefer? Do you think that men and women have different purposes in this life and the eternities, or is it more individual? Can a yin/yang duality exist without assigning the traits by gender? Discuss.
Wheat & Tares 
I’ve not heard of the profiling system, but it sounds intriguing. Jung has his own personality system based on four archetypes, but they differ slightly with gender: King/Queen, Warrior/Mother, Magician/Wise Woman, Lover/Lover. Maybe this gender neutral system will work better for people who feel oppressed by traditional gender roles.
I appreciate the thought you’ve taken to express your feelings about the limitations and harm gendered expectations can have in the church. I think we are all responding to our own experiences and pain. To be perfectly honest, my own spiritual journey recently has pushed me into trying to get in touch with my masculinity, which may be why I’m drawing lines which are more gender specific. I was raised by an artistic, somewhat feminine father, who took us out painting in the woods while all the other dads went fishing with their sons. My mother was also very dominant. Church is “feminine” in that it constantly challenges men to repress their aggressive masculinity and become “as a little child, meek, humble, patient.” I turned out to be artistic, thin, non-athletic, somewhat emotionally disconnected (not because of any of lack by my parents or church), with a kind of envy of masculine men, and an awe of feminine women (although I am attracted to all kinds of strength, masculine or feminine). This is somewhat different than your, or Hedgehog’s and Andrew S.’s experience I gather. So it should come as no surprise that we butt heads on the subject.
In the end, I like what you said about each of us being a unique mix of ying and yang. I believe in complimenting dualities, whether those are presented in gendered ways or not. We are all striving for wholeness.
I’m not wildly keen on profiling of this sort. A quick examination of the summaries linked points me more towards type 4 than anything else. But I tend to view these things as yet another attempt to try and categorise people into neat little boxes we can label. Consequently I was amused by some of the comments at the bottom of the link where commenters found they couldn’t fit themselves neatly into any one category.
I’m also puzzled by the popularity of this type of exercise. It seems that a lot of people actually like others to tell them what they are. If they find it helpful I guess that might be a good thing, for themselves, but I think it could be harmful if they then try to fit everyone else into those self-same categories.
It’s the nature of the beast that some people are going to find a category describes them very well. This shouldn’t be taken as validation of the particular system however.
Nate I’ve found that is often the case, we respond to our own experiences and especially to those that we have felt disadvantaged us. We don’t want others to have to experience the same disadvantage, so we advocate for a better way. This author has another book called “Remembering Wholeness” which is about honoring everyone for the gifts they have and not judging everyone against a standard.
Hedgehog: I understand the pushback on these type of categorizing systems. It’s been frustrating after I took the online class I would see posts that said, “if your favorite part of school growing up was silent reading you are a type 4.” But I’m a type 3/4 and pushback within the system because they are stereotyping people, just in a different way. I’ve also found people when they find their strengths in the system can then go overboard with them and they become weaknesses. I’ve decided to take what I can use from it, and what I find helpful and leave the rest. It certainly has its limitations.
I guess I wanted to bring this up because up to the point I agree with Nate that there are dual/opposite characteristics that I see can be described on the yin and yang system . . . but like you and Andrew S., they’ve wrongly be described by gender. I don’t think gender has much to do with it; and that it can be harmful to do so.
I think the only other personality typing I’ve enjoyed is when BuzzFeed had a “who is your spirit animal” test using Meyers-Briggs. It said I’m an owl married to a wolf and we have an otter for a child. We all laughed because that is kind of close to our family dynamics…..
I’m a fan of personality profiling because (big generalization ahead) it seems to me that the people who are attracted to this type of profiling are the ones who get less applause from the world (like introverts), and the tests and explanations help people to see their qualities in positive terms. Definitely including myself here.
I also like that they keep gender out of the discussion, by making it about personality traits or energy or whatever, and not about roles or expectations based on someone’s sex.
I’m also a fan of keeping a yin/yang perspective. Not to keep things in a male/female framework, but to remind ourselves that individuals, communities, and the universe needs a balance of positive traits. We need both thought and action. Both seriousness and levity. Both spontaneity and planning skills. And we need to appreciate all these qualities in each other instead of expecting everyone to be “just like me.”
I am a fan of personality profiles just as a way to start discussions and have people talk about themselves and how they view others.
There is no magical formula for putting everyone in a box…but there are some things that when raised, can initiate good discussions and understandings of how people are different…not better or worse.
Typically, any test like this I take, I end up a balanced score of little bits of multiple categories. But I would guess my dominant would be Type 2: Oxygen. Prior tests have typically put me in that type of realm.
The value to me would come from recognizing some of my strengths and weaknesses, and then finding things I might do to enhance my weaknesses and further develop and accept my strengths.
If it leads to discussion and actions, it can be a helpful tool.
I don’t think men and women have different traits…I think it is personal and complex, influenced by genetics, family environment, church culture, and experiences in life.
Heber13, your comment on family environment reminded me of my family’s inside joke of having a long line of “Briscoe Women.” My maternal line is known for being the stronger, more dominant personality in their marriages – so when one marries into the family, as my husband did, there are always jokes about “Good luck managing your Briscoe Woman.” I think my grandmother is a feminist even though she would never claim it, she bristles at the fact her husband is the head of the home – and often claims “yes, but I’m the neck and I determine the direction the head faces.” She also confided she has long had problems with the discrepancies between girls/boys programs.
And when I married into my husband’s family he comes from a family culture of really strong priesthood leadership and female submission. I’d never even had seen that pattern in my own extended family and it’s been a bit rocky to fit into the family.
I was sure there were quite a few people who’d known and participated in Carol Tuttle’s type of personality profiling. She has even developed a system where you have a “wardrobe guide” based on your type with a color card and guidelines on how to buy your clothes. It’s interesting.
Kristine: “I think the only other personality typing I’ve enjoyed is when BuzzFeed had a “who is your spirit animal” test using Meyers-Briggs. It said I’m an owl married to a wolf and we have an otter for a child. We all laughed because that is kind of close to our family dynamics…..”
I don’t mind that kind of fun thing, that isn’t meant to be taken too seriously. We enjoyed ourselves discovering which Hogwarts house we’d be assigned to – the kids and I were Ravenclaw, and my husband Hufflepuff. We were happy with our assignments, though the questions were hardly rigorous.
Also not a huge fan of personality typing, but I’m like Heber13 where I end up pretty balanced between categories. In high school one of our classes took the red/blue/white/yellow test, and my blue and white scores tied with a yellow close behind. Pretty much the only take away was that I’m not a red, so… not all that helpful. I’ve also noticed that how I answer the questions is influenced by my mood, so I’m not very consistent.
I agree with Hedgehog that these are harmless when taken in fun. I think for some people they can be helpful if they are struggling to find direction, trying to figure out the course that will make them most happy in life. At least that’s what some have told me.
I’ve noticed that many eastern philosophies seem to become fads among Mormon populations (ranging from “natural” remedies to feng shui to energy profiling). I can understand a bit of an anti-science rhetoric (given the push to avoid secularism), but it is curious to me that we would embrace philosophies that have origins in other religions. Is it be a throwback to the folk magic/spiritualism stuff in early church history?
I learned about Carol Tuttle’s system a couple of years ago and I find it very accurate and insightful. I am a type 2–I am naturally the “ideal” LDS woman–soft spoken, subtle, not too ambitious, gets along, etc. Carol’s system helped me realize that not all LDS women are the same as me.